Guest Crazy

This is what happens when a friend is nice enough to let you set your characters loose on their blog. BR let me do this a couple years ago, and I post it here for new enjoyment with a little editing update!

P.S. BR has written many other urban fantasy books since this time and you should totally check them out!

Dakota: Where the hell are we today? This doesn’t look like Thorne’s place.

Sadie: We’re guests at the blog of BR Kingsolver, who wrote The Succubus Gift and Succubus Unleashed.

D: Succubus? I’ve had enough of them.

Sadie: Different kind. Calm down.

D: *mmph*

Dakota: Men can be so melodramatic.

Sadie: Oh really? Miss hiss-like-a-viper-at-drop-of-hat?

Dakota: Seriously? You sound like an idiot. What is wrong with you?

Madison: No one really knows yet.

Sadie: *sigh* ANYWAYS. We are guests of BR Our lovely author even helped out on some of the book covers.

D: What, just doing covers for our books isn’t enough for her any more?

Madison: She enjoys doing it, and helping out other authors with reasonable fees. Are you really going to give her shit for that?

D: No, not for that really. I think all the shit she did to me in Blood Moon is enough to give her crap for. I mean, was it really fucking necessary to…

Sadie: Shh! Maybe some folk out there haven’t read it yet. You don’t want to give away all the secrets.

D: Come on. It’s my life she’s writing about! I should be able to say whatever I damn well please.

Dakota: I bet you’re regretting saying that I am the most troublesome one now, aren’t you?

Madison: You’re still a pain in the ass.

Dakota: Look who’s talking.

Sadie: Don’t make me separate the two of you. We’re here to talk about Thorne’s books. BR has been kind enough to give us a spot on the blog to get the word out, so let’s not waste it with bickering, okay?

D: Fine. *sighs* Well, her latest Adelheid novel tromps all over my existence.

Madison: You could be a little more diplomatic.

D: Isn’t honesty better?

Madison: You’re incorrigible.

D: Fine, you do it.

Madison: Fine, I will. *pauses, takes a breath* The third book in the Blood Rights Series follows D–the cantankerous Southern bastard who can’t play well with others sitting here with us…

D: Hey!

Madison: …as he makes something of a personal journey through the preternatural life, and there’s some other stuff going on that tries to make his life just miserable. As I’m sure he’d tell you.

D: I seriously don’t see how that was any more diplomatic than what I said.

Sadie: I really can’t take any of you anywhere.

Dakota: Can I point out that I’m the best behaved person here today? *pauses* In fact, we’re on book three and I’m book two. It’s done. Why am I even here?

Sadie: Because Thorne likes you. You are the narrator of the second book so might as well get some shout-out going.

Dakota: Then why is Madison here? None of the books are hers.

Madison: I’m so not feeling any love here.

Sadie: Because she’s a nice girl. *pauses* And she threatened to leave the curtains open while I was in the daylight coma.

D: Doesn’t sound very nice to me.

Madison: Nice doesn’t mean that you can’t be practical.

Sadie: This could get ugly.

Dakota: We’re two bloodsuckers and two half-animals, could we really get any uglier?

Sadie, Madison & D: Hey!

Dakota: What?

Sadie: Before this gets any worse, I’m going to tell our readers that you can find out more about the Blood Rights Series, as well as her other works, at her website.

Dakota: Which is oh-so-creatively called:

Madison: It’s easy to remember. I would have thought you’d like that.

D: Would you all just shut up? You’re giving me a headache.

Sadie: I can’t imagine anyone wanting to read more about the lot of you after this, and BR is never going to invite us again…but if anyone does want to read more, there are book covers, blurbs and links on Thorne’s site. Please feel free to stop by. I promise I’ll make them behave.

Dakota: *snorts* Fat chance of that.